


Tweet Tweet Bitch

by gayplums



Series: So, You Got Twitter [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, Bisexual Ned Leeds, Bisexual Peter Parker, Bisexual Steve Rogers, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Everyone Is Gay, Fix-It, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff and Crack, Gay, Gay Bucky Barnes, Gen, Group chat, Identity Reveal, Lesbian Michelle Jones, No Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Pansexual Tony Stark, Peter is a Little Shit, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Pre-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Social Media, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Trans Peter Parker, Trans Steve Rogers, Twitter, civil war? whats that?, endgame does not exist, no beta we die like men, this is a mess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-25
Updated: 2019-05-23
Packaged: 2019-12-07 13:36:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 23
Words: 11,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18235613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gayplums/pseuds/gayplums
Summary: the avengers have (or will create) twitter accounts, watch as they slowly fall into hell through shit posts, rants, and Pure Crack-peter-man@peterparkourBio: this is the timeline god abandonedJoined: June 2015Born: Aug 10, 2001Pinned Tweetpeter-man @peterparkourwhy did god leave us-peter-man @peterparkourtony stark is a pansexual disasterMJ @QueenBitch@peterparkour elaborate?





	1. this is the timeline god abandoned

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [twitter is onto something](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15625167) by [pomegranateboy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pomegranateboy/pseuds/pomegranateboy). 



> here is everyones acc:
> 
> Peter Parker: peter-man @peterparkour  
> Spider-Man: biderman @swingsbothways  
> Ned Leeds: I’m In @ned.in.the.chair  
> Michelle Jones: MJ @QueenBitch  
> Shuri: Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado  
> Tony Stark: Iron Man* @Tony_Stark  
> Steve Rogers: Captain America* @Cap.Rogers  
> James Rhodes: Rhodey* @IronPatriot  
> Bruce Banner: BB* @greenman  
> James Barnes: Bucky B @notarobot  
> Natasha Romanov: Queen* @queennat  
> Sam Wilson: Falcon @birdman  
> Clint Barton: Hawkeye* @archerbird  
> T’Challa: King T’Challa* @BlackPanther  
> FRIDAY: FRIDAY @TS_AI  
> Karen: Karen @spideysAI  
> Nick Fury: Fury* @DFury  
> Thor: Thor* @thundergod  
> Loki: snake @slitherin  
> Wanda Maximoff: witch @witchbitch  
> Vision: Vision @Vision  
> Flash Thompson: fastest man alive @fthompson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> peter-man
> 
> @peterparkour
> 
> Bio: this is the timeline god abandoned
> 
> Joined: June 2015
> 
> Born: Aug 10, 2001
> 
>  
> 
> Pinned Tweet
> 
> peter-man @peterparkour
> 
> why did god leave us

**peter-man**

**@peterparkour**

Bio: this is the timeline god abandoned

Joined: June 2015

Born: Aug 10, 2001

 

Pinned Tweet

**peter-man @peterparkour**

why did god leave us

 

* * *

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

tony stark is a pansexual disaster

 

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@peterparkour elaborate?

 

 **peter-man** **@peterparkour**

he put down his phone, then not even a minute later asked me if i stole it, despite it being on the table behind him

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@peterparkour Kid, don't expose me like this.

 

**I'm In @ned.in.the.chair**

@Tony_Stark wait you're pan?

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@ned.in.the.chair [what about it? gif]

 

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@Tony_Stark god hasn't abandoned us after all

 

**I'm In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour DUDEDUDEDUDE HE REPLIED SKJUCBDUWGCDU

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@ned.in.the.chair lmao

 

**I'm In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour THIS IS SERIOUS CDUBHDKJBDSJKBDH

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@peterparkour Is he okay?

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Tony_Stark yeah, just give him a sec to come back to reality lmao

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@peterparkour Okay. Also, come to my lab tomorrow, I have some ideas for The Thing.

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Tony_Stark yeet

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@peterparkour @Tony_Stark what the fuck

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@fthompson :)


	2. thanks for the suit mr.stark!!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> biderman @swingsbothways
> 
> @Tony_Stark did you eat my pizza

**bi bi bi @bishit**

so apparently iron man is pan, and spidey if his acc name and @ are anything to go by

 

**Spooks @creepygay**

@bishit and 1/10 of the population is queer

 

**am god @gaydisaster**

@bishit @creepygay so at least a few of the avengers are queer…

 

**bi bi bi @bishit**

@creepygay @gaydisaster steve rogers is Big Gay

 

**Captain America* @Cap.Rogers**

@bishit @creepygay @gaydisaste I'm actually bisexual.

 

**bi bi bi @bishit**

@creepygay @gaydisaster @Cap.Rogers WTAFT TJE FUCK-

 

_

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

new suit hell yeah

 

**Shahooketh @pmldisaster**

@swingsbothways new suit?

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@pmldisaster its more resilient!!! meaning that if i, for example, got shot, i am less likely to be as hurt as a normal person/without the suit!

 

**Shahooketh @pmldisaster**

@swingsbothways that sounds like you're speaking from experience but that's also so cool

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@pmldisaster It does, @swingsbothways what happened

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@Tony_Stark thanks for the suit mr. stark!

 

_

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@Tony_Stark did you eat my pizza

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@swingsbothways no, i did not, it was @archerbird

 

**Hawkeye* @archerbird**

@swingsbothways i thought it was everyones pizza…

 

**Queen* @queennat**

@archerbird you idiot

 

**Hawkeye* @archerbird**

@queennat you ate it too!!!

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@queennat nat… :(

 

**Queen* @queennat**

@archerbird @swingsbothways oh no i can feel his puppy dog eyes. clint i hate you

 

**Hawkeye* @archerbird**

@queennat we both ate it!!

 

**Queen* @queennat**

@archerbird i blame you

 

**Hawkeye* @archerbird**

@swingsbothways @queennat :(

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@swingsbothways I’ll buy you a new one

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@Tony_Stark :)!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao hope you liked this shit


	3. peter-man: he took my suit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter teared up, and Tony pulled him in for a hug, arms tight around the younger boys body. Peter sobbed, quiet, then another one that was choked yet louder, then it all came crashing out and his sobs were bordering on wails.
> 
>  
> 
> “It's okay, Kid, it's okay, let it out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i will be following some of the timeline btw. civil war almost-kinda happened, there was a fight but it was more verbal, not physical. they figured the shit out and the accords and their friendship is all gud.

**peter-man @peterparkour**

fuck stark lives

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour you okay, dude?

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@ned.in.the.chair dm me

 

~~woosh woosh dms~~

 

**I’m In**

what happened?

 

**peter-man**

he took my suit

 

**I’m In**

oh no, i'm sorry dude

 

**peter-man**

at least i still have my old suit

 

**I’m In**

but that's dangerous

doesn’t your actual suit have a bunch of stuff that prevent you from being like, killed and stuff?

 

**peter-man**

being spider-man is dangerous

and as far as i know, my first suit is my actual suit

 

**I’m In**

peter…

 

peter?

 

ok, i hope you get your suit back

 

_

 

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

mt sartk

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@swingsbothways  mr sta rk

 

**Cas @nblord**

@swingsbothways you okay spidey..?

 

**Iron Shrek @steelswamp**

@swingsbothways r u drunk?

 

**Brooke @brokee2473627**

@swingsbothways are you okay spidey?  
  
[almost 100 other people ask if he's okay, drunk, high, etc]

 

~~woosh woosh dms~~

 

**I’m In**

hey peter are you okay?

**MJ**

Peter?

 

**I'm In**

pete?

...peter?

 

**MJ**

Peter

I swear to fuck if this is a prank

Answer us

 

**I'm In**

peter

 

_

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

got my suit back and i'm still alive yeet

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@swingsbothways oh thank god

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@ned.in.the.chair sorry for worrying you and @QueenBitch, i got a building dropped on me and then i crashed a plane

 

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@swingsbothways excuse me

 

**I'm In @ned.in.the.chair**

@swingsbothways 1. you got a what dropped on you? 2. nice job crashing that plane that's kind of cool

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@ned.in.the.chair it was kind of traumatising

 

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@swingsbothways idk about you but both are traumatising

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@QueenBitch yeah

 

**I'm In @ned.in.the.chair**

@QueenBitch yeah

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@swingsbothways excuse me

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@Tony_Stark yeah, sorry for crashing your plane

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@swingsbothways screw the part where you crashed my plane kid, you got a bUILDING DROPPED ON YOU?!

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@Tony_Stark gotta blast

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@swinagbothways oh no you don't

 

~

 

  
Peter puts down his phone, balling his hands up together and resting his head on both fists, before deciding he should just turn off all notifications and just play a game on his phone. He turns it on, seeing about a hundred texts from, mostly, Tony and his friends, but a few seem to be from some of the Avengers, but he can't really see from Tony spamming him with texts, asking him what happened and who hurt him.

 

He faintly heard the sound of rockets - specifically, the rockets on the Iron Man suits - getting louder. He sighs in annoyance, he does not want to talk to Tony about that night.

 

The rockets get quiet, then he hears the sound of a suit hitting a metal surface. He looks over to his window and sees Tony opening it, his helmet retracting into his suit, revealing the concerned face of Tony Stark.

 

“Hey, Mr. Stark.” Peter says quietly, a feeling of guilt and anger (or stress if he's gonna be honest, or all three).

 

“So, a building?” Straight to the chase, okay. Peter tentatively nodded, and looked away, eyes on his bedroom door. “When? When did a fucki-fucking _building_ fall on you?”

 

Peter swallowed nervously, “Th-The day of the plane crash…” Silence. Silence.

 

“What.”

 

Peter looked at Tony - whose suit was standing stiffly in front of the bed, and the man himself was sat on his bed - his head moving slowly, he nodded, slower. Tony was staring at him with a face that was obviously masked, under it was - most obviously - shock, disappointment, anger and sadness. Peter looked back down at his hand. “No - look at me, Peter. You- You said the day you crashed the plane, before or after?”

 

“Before.” “A building fell on you and you went and crashed a plane-” A choking noise, Peter swiftly looked up and saw Tony, eyes heartbroken and his hand covering and rubbing his mouth, throat bobbing and stuttering, heart beating fast and breathing stuttered.

 

“Don't look at me with those damn puppy dog eyes - I- you? A building…” Tony bit his lip and hid his head in his hands.

 

“I saved people-”

 

“You didn't have too! If that dick stole all my stuff, I could have gone after him!” Tony looked at Peter desperately.

 

“I just wanted to be like you…”

 

“Kid…”

 

Peter teared up, and Tony pulled him in for a hug, arms tight around the younger boys body. Peter sobbed, quiet, then another one that was choked yet louder, then it all came crashing out and his sobs were bordering on wails.

 

“It's okay, Kid, it's okay, let it out.”


	4. kashoot me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> snake @slitherin
> 
> i am a proud thor stabber

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its april fools day but i promise this is a real update

**Bucky B @notarobot**

Loki just stabbed Thor

 

**Gay Thott @ThotRainbow**

@notarobot omg is thor okay??!!

 

**Bucky B @notarobot**

@ThotRainbow Yeah, he just has a stab wound.

 

**Gay Thott @ThotRainbow**

@notarobot oh ok

 

**Dek @Dekoazz**

@notarobot why did loki stab thor. also isn't loki like,,, the dude who tried to take over ny?

 

**Bucky B @notarobot**

@Dekoazz I don't know, apparently it's a thing Loki and Thor do.

 

**Dek @Dekoazz**

@notarobot o h o k

 

_

 

**Thor @thundergod**   
The Man of Spiders convinced me how to get a twitter, hello Midgardians! 

 

**CoCo @memegaybig**

@thundergod is this a fake?

 

**Kacy @Kacy6669**

@memegaybig god i hope not

 

**Thor @thundergod**

@memegaybig @Kacy6669 I do not think I am a “fake”

 

**CoCo @memegaybig**

@thundergod holy shit

 

_

 

**Miles @irondaddy**

Hey @thundergod is it true that loki stabs you

 

**Thor @thundergod**

@irondaddy Haha! Yep! Loki does enjoy stabbing me from time to time.

 

**Miles @irondaddy**

@thundergod eye-

 

**Bucky B @notarobot**

@thundergod hey thor

 

**Thor @thundergod**

@notarobot Friend, hello! You have the twitter as well?   
  


**Bucky B @notarobot**

@thundergod yeah

 

**Thor @thundergod**

@notarobot Interesting! Does everyone else have a twitter?

 

**Bucky B @notarobot**

@thundergod i think so

 

_

 

**snake @slitherin**

i am a proud thor stabber

**Thor @thundergod**

@slitherin Hello, brother!

**snake @slitherin**

@thundergod kashoot me

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@slitherin hey lokes

**snake @slitherin**

@peterparkour hello peter

**Thor @thundergod**

@peterparkour Hello friend! I did not know you also had twitter!!!

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@thundergod @slitherin @peterparkour how the fuck and what the fuck????

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@fthompson mood

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@fthomspon mood

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@fthompson mood

 

**snake @slitherin**

@fthompson mood

**Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado**

@fthompson mood

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@freshurivocado OMG SHURI

**Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado**

@peterparkour OMG PETEY!!!!!!

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@freshurivocado ICHDKJBCJKDSBKj

**Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado**

@peterparkour DSHAJHFUEIFHJ!!!!

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@freshurivocado uwu

**Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado**

@peterparkour uwu

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@peterparkour so now you know the fucking princess of wakando??

**Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado**

@peterparkour are you cheating on me with this ‘princess of wakando’?

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@freshurivocado w a k a n d o eye-

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@peterparkour what

**Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado**

@fthompson are you always confused?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a R e Y o U c H e A t I n G o N m E w I t H t H i S ' p R i N c E s S o F w A k A n D o ' ?


	5. “he called me dad…”

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BB* @greenman
> 
> @swingsbothways @peterparkour Why is Tony crying on the floor?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hewwo i is back after two days and im dressed in black and Super Duper[tm] Sad[tm]

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Tony_Stark MR STARK HELP CHJDJDSGBUGDHSV

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@peterparkour Kid?!?! Are you okay!?!?! Did soemone hurt you?!

 

**I'm In @ned.in.the.chair**

@Tony_Stark don't worry he's just being dramatic

 

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@Tony_Stark yeah, we were just doing Teen Things and then he tried to spin his scooter and it hit his ankles.

he is now laying on the sidewalk, clutching his ankle and wailing about how god has abandoned him.

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@QueenBitch @ned.in.the.chair Oh ok. Thanks @peterparkour You made me get in my suit for no reason, I thought someone was trying to kill you.

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Tony_Stark mr stark please i'm dying i want to see my father one last time before i die

 

_

 

**BB* @greenman**

@swingsbothways @peterparkour Why is Tony crying on the floor?

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@greenman what makes you think i had something to do with it?

 

**BB* @greenman**

@swingsbothways [video of tony crying on the floor while mumbling “he called me dad…”]

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@greenman :0

 

**Rhodey* @IronPatriot**

@swingsbothways You really have him wrapped up in your finger, huh?

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@IronPatriot i guess

 

**Captain America* @Cap.Rogers**

@greenman @swingsbothways so that's why he's crying

 

**Hawkeye* @archerbird**

@greenman @swingsbothways lol loser

 

**FRIDAY @TS_AI**

@archerbird Boss has told me to tell you, “Fuck you.”

 

**Hawkeye* @archerbird**

@TS_AI >:O

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@TS_AI @archerbird lmao

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> w he n w e al l f a ll a sl ee p w h e r e d o w e g o ?


	6. Daily Bugle @DailyBugle | Queens Menace Adopted by Tony Stark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> just a chapter for what happened after the whole thing in the last chapter lol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i updated the tags... hehe

**Daily Globe @DailyGlobe**

Is Spider-Man Tony Starks Son?

 

**The Pulse @The_Pulse**

Has Tony Stark Adopted Queens Vigilante?

 

**Daily Bugle @DailyBugle**

Queens Menace Adopted by Tony Stark

 

**The Guardian @TheGuardian**

Spider-Man is Tony Starks Son, as Confirmed by Dr. Banner


	7. @Cap.Rogers im immune to your psas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> biderman @swingsbothways
> 
> eat ass suck a dick and sell drugs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i cant even remember the weekend im pretty sure i just repress everything after a day oop

**Nat-a-tat-tat @Natatat**

@swingsbothways Are you Tony’s son?

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@Natatat i wish lmao

 

_

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@queennat  мама паук

 

**Queen* @queennat**

@swingsbothways yeah?

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@queennat uwu <3

 

**Queen* @queennat**

@swingsbothways love you too  паук малыш

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

that was so wholesome

  
  


-

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

eat ass suck a dick and sell drugs

 

**Captain America* @Cap.Rogers**

@swingsbothways Spidey no

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@Cap.Rogers im immune to your psas you cant do shit h a h

 

**Captain America* @Cap.Rogers**

@swingsbothways excuse me

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@Cap.Rogers @swingsbothways are you gonna kill him?

 

**Captain America* @Cap.Rogers**

@swingsbothways How do you know about my PSA’s?

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@Cap.Rogers they show them in school

 

**Dev @bisexualfingerguns**

@swingsbothways *several people are typing…*

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

Don’t do drugs kids...


	8. i just want my peanuts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Falcon @birdman
> 
> someone took my fucking peanuts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short chapter but its also the second one today lmao

**Falcon @birdman**

someone took my fucking peanuts

 

_

 

**PopBuzz @popbuzz**

Who stole Sam Wilson’s, the Falcon, peanuts?

 

**witch @witchbitch**

@popbuzz not me

 

**Falcon @birdman**

@witchbitch wanda i swear to god if you stole my peanuts…

 

**witch @witchbitch**

@birdman biphobia

 

**Falcon @birdman**

@witchbitch i just want my peanuts 

  
  


**peter-man @peterparkour**

@birdman they were good peanuts

 

**Falcon @birdman**

@witchbitch @peterparkour @Tony_Stark stark you need to put a fucking leash on your child

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@birdman @peterparkour He wanted peanuts, I let him have peanuts


	9. (._. )

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fastest man alive @fthompson
> 
> @peterparkour embarrassed about being gay?
> 
>  
> 
> disaster gay @wholeasswaffle
> 
> @fthompson if im not mistaken you just said that youd let spidey raw you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hahahaha im dead inside and have no idea what im doing

**biderman @swingsbothways**

:(

 

**Bucky B @notarobot**

@swingsbothways who hurt you

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@notarobot :(((

 

**Captain America* @Cap.Rogers**

@swingsbothways Kid?

 

**Queen* @queennat**

@swingsbothways who do we need to kill

 

**Rhodey* @IronPatriot**

@queennat Are we sure @Cap.Rogers would kill someone for the kid?

 

**Captain America* @Cap.Rogers**

@IronPatriot Yes.

 

**Captain America* @Cap.Rogers**

@Avengers assemble

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@Avengers @Cap.Rogers What happened?

 

**Big Slut Energy @abenbers**

are they seriously assembling because spideys hurt?

 

**Rhodey* @IronPatriot**

@abengers yes

 

_Later_

**The Guardian @TheGuardian**

Is Queens’ Spider-Man an Avenger?

[photo of the Avengers happily eating ice cream and yogurt with Spider-Man] 

_

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

i’d let spidey raw me

**Cindy @moonmoon**

@fthompson mood

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@fthompson i

**disaster gay @wholeasswaffle**

@peterparkour are you telling me you arent gay for spidey?

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@wholeasswaffle i mean-

**disaster gay @wholeasswaffle**

@peterparkour wbt thor?

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@wholeasswaffle everyone is gay for thor

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour are we going to ignore…

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@ned.in.the.chair yes

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@peterparkour embarrassed about being gay?

**disaster gay @wholeasswaffle**

@fthompson if im not mistaken you just said that youd let spidey raw you

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@fthompson @wholeasswaffle yeah!

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@fthompson @wholeasswaffle yeah

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@fthompson @wholeasswaffle (._. )

**Cindy @moonmoon**

@peterparkour mood

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@peterparkour mood

**false! @dingabe**

@peterparkour mood

**Bon Jovi @charles**

@peterparkour mood

**Sal @avrillavigne**

@peterparkour mood

**Roger Harrington @mrharrington**

@peterparkour mood

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@peterparkour mood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i kinda want to add lokis children but idk how it would contribute to the plot but big fluffy pupper and many legged horse and other childs so???


	10. cinnamon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> peter-man @peterparkour
> 
> @Tony_Stark P U P P Y [a picture of peter and a dirty puppy, they appear to be in an ally]
> 
>  
> 
> peter-man @peterparkour
> 
> @Tony_Stark @peterparkour i'm keeping her

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao sorry im a week late i had a week break from school and yeah

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Tony_Stark M R S T A R K @mayp A U N T M A Y

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@peterparkour Yeah kid?

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Tony_Stark P U P P Y [a picture of peter and a dirty puppy, they appear to be in an ally]

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Tony_Stark @peterparkour i'm keeping her

 

**May @mayp**

@peterparkour Our apartment doesn't allow dogs, honey.

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@mayp P L E A S E

 

**May @mayp**

@peterparkour I'm sorry

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@peterparkour I can feel your puppy dog eyes… I can keep him for you

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Tony_Stark THANKS MR DAD

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Tony_Stark @peterparkour MR STARK I MEAN MR STARK

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@peterparkour name the dog and then bring her over

 

-

 

**snake @slitherin**

why is stark crying lmao

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@slitherin SHYT YOUR FUCK

 

-

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

i gave her a bath and my fluffy blanket and now shes an angel [a cute picture of a curly-haired peter and a little puppy with sun-shining fur that is sleeping]

 

**theres a b?! @bben**

@peterparkour i may have only seen two pictures of the little pupper but i already know she is the love of my life and would die for her

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@bben same!!! i love her!!!!!!!

 

-

 

**Thor @rdthundergod**

What is this little creature [video of the puppy jumping on Thor’s leg, smiling and yipping happily with her tail a wagging blur]

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@thundergod her name is Cinnamon and she is my baby

 

**Thor @thundergod**

@peterparkour Oh! Well congratulations on the baby!

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@thundergod wait-

 

-

 

**Thor @thundergod**

@Tony_Stark You never told me Peter had a baby!

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@thundergod What

 

**Thor @thundergod**

@Tony_Stark The puppy! Cinnamon, Peters daughter!

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@thundergod I think I'm missing something

 

**Thor @thundergod**

@Tony_Stark My brother, Loki, had a son, he was a wolf, Fenrir.

 

**snake @slitherin**

@thundergod @Tony_Stark i thought we werent going to talk about him.

 

**Thor @thundergod**

@slitherin @Tony_Stark I was just informing the Man of Iron of you and Peter’s daughters similarity.

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@thundergod @slitherin @Tony_Stark there seems to be a misunderstanding…

 

**Thor @thundergod**

@peterparkour @slitherin @Tony_Stark What ever do you mean??

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@thundergod @slitherin @Tony_Stark i didnt give birth to Cinnamon i only adopted her,,, i found her in an alley…

 

**Thor @thundergod**

@peterparkour @slitherin @Tony_Stark Oh, that does make sense, I didn't think humans gave birth to animals.

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@thundergod @slitherin @Tony_Stark yeah. also, lokes i want to meet Fenrir

 

**snake @slitherin**

@peterparkour that's impossible

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@slitherin oh :(

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> btw im adding lokis children uwu


	11. djsfbjdskfdskj hello

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bider-king @swingsbothways
> 
> i have rebranded

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi welcome to chilis

**biderman @swingsbothways**

fake everyone is fake

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@swingsbothways may i ask why???

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@ned.in.the.chair MY ICE CREAM WAS FAKE

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@swingsbothways oh no

 

**Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado**

@swingsbothways @ned.in.the.chair lmfao press f to pay respect

 

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@swingsbothways @ned.in.the.chair @freshurivocado f

 

**Vision @Vision**

@swingsbothways f

 

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@swingsbothways f

 

**snake @slitherin**

@swingsbothways hahaha

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@slitherin Y O U

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@slitherin @swingsbothways I THOUGHT WE WERE GONNA WATCH A NICE MOVIE AND EAT ICE CREAM TOGETHER BUT N O P E I EAT A I R

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@slitherin @swingsbothways :( why?

  


**snake @slitherin**

@swingsbothways why do i feel bad what did you do to me

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@slitherin @swingsbothways welcome to ‘Knowing Spider-Man’

 

**snake @slitherin**

@Tony_Stark i don't like it

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@slitherin Don't like what, knowing him or loving him?

 

**snake @slitherin**

@Tony_Stark emotions

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@slitherin Wait until you know you would sell your soul for the kid

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@Tony_Stark what

 

-

 

**abb @abbsloves**

@swingsbothways is our bisexual king

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@abbsloves i thought that was mr stark

 

**abb @abbsloves**

@swingsbothways djsnajknvcidsnfasdkcjdsn hi

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@abbsloves djsfbjdskfdskj hello

 

**abb @abbsloves**

@swingsbothways honestly i'm kind of freaking out right now

 

**biderman @swingsbothways**

@abbsloves same

 

-

 

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

i have rebranded

 

-

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

are we just going to accept that @ned.in.the.chair and @peterparkour know @swingsbothways or???

 

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

@fthompson yes

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@swingsbothways holy fuck

 

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@fthompson yeah

 

**Cindy @moonmoon**

@fthompson at this point yeah

 

**Roger Harrington @mrharrington**

@fthompson weirder has happened

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@fthompson i thought the excuse was the SI internship??

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@Tony_Stark excuse???  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sir this is a mcdonalds


	12. peter-man @peterparkour : field trip :D

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cindy @moonmoon
> 
> @fthompson [screenshot of what FRIDAY said]
> 
>  
> 
> fastest man alive @fthompson
> 
> @moonmoon oh god

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i saw endgame and i decided to say "fuck that shit" and now endgame doesnt exist

**peter-man @peterparkour**

field trip :D

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour yay!

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@ned.in.the.chair woooo!

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@peterparkour @ned.in.the.chair have fun boys

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Tony_Stark @ned.in.the.chair thanks mister stark!

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@Tony_Stark @peterparkour holy shit

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@ned.in.the.chair @peterparkour @Tony_Stark did that just happen

 

**Cindy @moonmoon**

@fthompson yes

 

-

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour hey are you alive

**Taylor @notswift**

Omg Spiderman, this wizard, and Iron Man are in the park fighting

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

Holy shit Spider-Man went on the giant donut

**Karen @spideysAI**

@Tony_Stark sir, @swingsbothways is running out of oxyegen

**nate @ghostyboi**

@spideysAI holy shit

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@spideysAI Damn it, is that boy trying to get himself killed?!

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

spaceships arent fun...

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

this space donut is shit and i don't like it

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

there is this wizard guy and his cape is fun, im naming the cape Capey

**Spiders @iwish**

@swingsbothways thanks for keeping us in touch with what's going on

**Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado**

@iwish there is a spaceship heading for wakanda. while i don't think we are fucked i think we are fucked.

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

@freshurivocado the donut just landed on this planet but what im wondering is how i still have service

**FRIDAY @TS_AI**

@swingsbothways you are welcome

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

@TS_AI oh thanks fri

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

oh god oh fuck

 

\- some time passes -

 

**Cindy @moonmoon**

People are disappearing what's going on

**Cindy @moonmoon**

@swingsbothways ???!?

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@moonmoon oh my god you're still alive thank god…

**Cindy @moonmoon**

@bbrant did the avengers lose??? @swingsbothways what's going on???

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@swingsbothways ??

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour peter??

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@ned.in.the.chair @peterparkour peter are you alive??

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@ned.in.the.chair @peterparkour dude @swingsbothways are you alive or did the service go?

**FRIDAY @TS_AI**

@QueenBitch @ned.in.the.chair Spider-Man and Peter Parker disappeared along with many of the other people on the planet, Titan.   
  


**MJ @QueenBitch**

@TS_AI you're fucking with me

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@QueenBitch @TS_AI no

**Cindy @moonmoon**

@TS_AI @QueenBitch @ned.in.the.chair oh god

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@TS_AI @QueenBitch @ned.in.the.chair oh no… no 

 

-

**Cindy @moonmoon**

I want to see how many of us are still alive @fthompson @bbrant @dingabe @charles @avrillavigne @mrharrington @QueenBitch @ned.in.the.chair say here

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@moonmoon here

**false! @dingabe**

@moonmoon here

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@moonmoon here

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@moonmoon here

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@moonmoon here

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@moonmoon … you didn't add parker…

**Cindy @moonmoon**

@fthompson [screenshot of what FRIDAY said]

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@moonmoon oh god

**false! @dingabe**

@moonmoon @fthompson noo not him 

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@moonmoon @fthompson ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, you went on an alien planet and fought a titan...


	13. excuse my french but holy shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> false! @dingabe
> 
> @ned.in.the.chair what the fuck what the fuck we were supposed to go on a field trip and now everything is dead

**President Ellis @POTUS**

The leader of the alien group that invaded Earth in multiple locations, then the @Avengers fought Thanos and the aliens in space and Wakanda. According to @Avengers, they lost. They are planning on fighting again and reversing Thanos’ actions.

 

**President Ellis @POTUS**

The official death toll is unknown, but according to the Avengers, half of all life in the universe is gone.

 

**President Ellis @POTUS**

Rest in peace Spider-Man, The Vision, King T’Challa, James Barnes, Wanda Maximoff, Sam Wilson, and the many other people who fought in the war, Infinity War.

 

-

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

oh my god did yall see POTUS’ tweets?

 

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@ned.in.the.chair that was terrifying… “half of all life” what does that mean i?????

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@bbrant i think it's obvious…

 

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@fthompson don't be fucking rude half of everything fucking died

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@QueenBitch i didn't mean to be rude

 

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@fthompson that's new

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@QueenBitch yeah

 

**false! @dingabe**

@ned.in.the.chair what the fuck what the fuck we were supposed to go on a field trip and now everything is dead

 

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@dingabe i cant 

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@bbrant @dingabe im sure the avengers will fix everything...

 

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@ned.in.the.chair a fucking raisin killed 50% of everything i'm sorry for feeling doubt

 

**Roger Harrington @mrharrington**

excuse my french but holy shit

 

-

 

**The Avengers @Avengers**

The Avengers are working valiantly to reverse the Snap, but Thanos could be anywhere at any time due to what he has. This will take time. Thank you.

-

 

**The Avengers @Avengers**

We believe we may have a way to reverse the Snap.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im gonna post a chapter right after this cuz why not lmao


	14. i lived bitch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Iron Man* @Tony_Stark
> 
> killing a titan with infinite power is hard im tired

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> told ya i would post a chapter right after the last one

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

i lived bitch

 

-

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

killing a titan with infinite power is hard im tired

 

**Captain America* @Cap.Rogers**

@Tony_Stark I agree

 

**Rhodey* @IronPatriot**

@Cap.Rogers @Tony_Stark I feel like I could sleep for a week

 

**BB* @greenman**

@IronPatriot @Cap.Rogers @Tony_Stark can i please sleep for a week

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@greenman @IronPatriot @Cap.Rogers lets just do that

 

**Hawkeye* @archerbird**

@Tony_Stark @greenman @IronPatriot @Cap.Rogers gn

 

**Falcon @birdman**

@archerbird @Tony_Stark @[all the others] i agree

 

**Queen* @queennat**

@birdman @archerbird @[all the others] fuck my reputation i have chocolate, a milkshake, and a few fluffy blankets.

 

-

 

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

im reading all these comments on how people feel after the avengers and co saving the universe and this is amazing im so proud to call these people my family

[he quoted a tweet: **Jen @ironjen** i watched my dad turn to dust a few months ago, and today i watched him come back. thank you avengers thank you thank you <3<3<3]

 

-

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour oof

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@ned.in.the.chair [b]lease

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour you tripped on a rock

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@ned.in.the.chair spare me please

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@peterparkour @ned.in.the.chair hah get fucked

**May @mayp**

@fthompson excuse me?

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@mayp @fthompson oh god he's dead

**May @mayp**

@fthompson what did you just say to my boy i’ll have you know that i know spiderman and by association i know the avengers, especially stark, but not only that i am being trained in fighting by natasha romanov if you ever bully my boy again i will find where you live and ground you rich ass 

**Captain America* @Cap.Rogers**

@mayp @fthompson Kid, I know from personal experience that you will die the next time you see her

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

help

 

-

 

**snake @slitherin**

i listened to a song and i feel

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@slitherin how do you feel?

**snake @slitherin**

@peterparkour emotions

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@slitherin oof

 

-

**Horse Boy @sleipnir**

I got an acc 

**Fen @wolfboi**

@sleipnir took you long enough

**Horse Boy @sleipnir**

@wolfboi oh my god you have one too?!

**Fen @wolfboi**

@sleipnir yea i told you while i was making you an account

**im unoriginal @hisshiss**

@sleipnir @wolfboi the baby finally got an account

**Horse Boy @sleipnir**

@hisshiss @wolfboi i am not a baby!!!

**Fen @wolfboi**

@sleipnir @hisshiss well you are the youngest

**Horse Boy @sleipnir**

@wolfboi @hisshiss i hate you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> s o ?
> 
> this is just me ignoring the fact that endgame happened (yes, i saw it, and now it doesnt exist)
> 
> also, im starting to feel a bit self conscious about my writing, is this too fast-paced? should i draw stuff out?? how im writing this story, im just getting random ideas and putting them in this story, and finding a way to weave them into this,,, i have no idea what im doing


	15. So, so far from ‘okay’.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fen @wolfboi  
> @peterparkour you know loki?
> 
> peter-man @peterparkour  
> @wolfboi yeah he's cool!
> 
> Fen @wolfboi  
> @peterparkour huh
> 
> peter-man @peterparkour  
> @wolfboi ???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> h mmm

**Fen @wolfboi**

@peterparkour you know loki?

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@wolfboi yeah he's cool!

 

**Fen @wolfboi**

@peterparkour huh

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@wolfboi ???  


 

-

**snake @slitherin**

@wolfboi who are you

**Fen @wolfboi**

@slitherin hey dad

-

**Hawkeye* @archerbird**

I've never seen loki look so… how the hell do i explain this… [picture of loki looking depressed and honestly like he's dead inside, but slowly dying and in shock. He doesn't look good.]

**elisa @ironqueen**

@archerbird oh my god what happened?! is he okay???

**Hawkeye* @archerbird**

@ironqueen idk and i'm afraid to ask

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

@archerbird @ironqueen should i ask?

**Hawkeye* @archerbird**

@swingsbothways @ironqueen yeah he likes you

* * *

 

 

Peter crawls through the vents to the lower living room in one of the penthouses that is in the tower - there are like 5 living rooms that he's seen. From the vents, he can see Loki, who honestly looks like he's in shock. He's frozen, staring ahead at nothing as he sits on the couch, shoulders hunched, eyes empty - yet confused, both his hands hang between his legs, elbows resting on his thighs.

Loki seems to have heard him in the vents, as his head subtly twitches towards where he is, eyes flickering to the floor and a sad expression grows on his face. Peter crawls out, dropping to the floor of the empty and slightly dusty living room, “Hey, Lokes, you okay?”

Loki’s eyes fill with tears and he feels scared, worrying for his friend. Peter slowly walks forward, left hand outreached in a silent ask for permission to touch Loki’s shoulder. He rests his hand on the gods shoulder, gently and in an attempt to ground him. He believes he's succeeded when the man looks at him, a sad expression on his face. 

As Loki’s eyes wander over Peter’s face they fill with more tears, they fall, turning his eyes red - redder than before Peter entered the room. 

Loki’s body shakes, throat bobbing with emotion. Peter pulls him into a hug, arms wrapping tightly around his body. Loki returns the hug, pulling him close.

He tries to speak, but his throat feels like he's being choked. “It's okay, it's okay.” Peter reassures.

It's not, it's so far, so far from ‘okay’, Loki thinks. So, so far from ‘okay’.

“Nn-no it's not.” He sobs. Peter’s arms tighten. 

“It's okay to cry.”

Oh. 

“It's okay.” Peter repeats. 

Crying may not make Loki feel better, but he feels cared for.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Peter asks as he pulls away minutes later. 

“My kids…” 

Peter feels like everything he's ever known has been a lie, but he guesses Thor told him Loki was a father. Was? Is?

“The-they’re… alive?” Loki questions, still not sure. “I-I don't know…?” He releases another sob, looking scared now. “Who?” Peter asks, looking at Loki, rubbing his shoulder. 

“Fe-Fenny…” He whispers, curing in on himself, shaking. “My son- my boy- I-  He’s alive?” 

* * *

**peter-man @peterparkour**

dsjhdbskjnciudskj???

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour mood

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@ned.in.the.chair CDKNCDINSDCI??????!!!!!

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... so,,, how was this?


	16. Why would I adopt him?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pepper:
> 
> For a ‘genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist’ you sure are stupid.
> 
> Do you want to adopt him?
> 
>  
> 
> Tony:
> 
> Why would I adopt him?
> 
>  
> 
> Pepper is offline
> 
>  
> 
> Tony:
> 
> Wait Pep
> 
> Come back
> 
> oh my god Peter just pet Dum-E im crying

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> njdksnkcz,naonsknkxaniodnewuy3287gnksaz dma cn | a summary of my life

**Roger Harrington @mrharrington**

I just talked with the principal who asked if we should bring the whole school on a field trip and i just said “no, no, no more field trips, please.” so no field trip

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@mrharrington everytime we go on a field trip something bad happens… oscorp

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@peterparkour @mrharrington washington dc, the elevator incident

 

**Sal @avrillavigne**

@fthompson @peterparkour @mrharrington MoMa

 

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@fthompson @peterparkour [@etc] that one trip where a kid died...

 

**false! @dingabe**

@bbrant @fthompson [@etc] no more field trips

 

-

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

be a tony :)

 

**Falcon @birdman**

@peterparkour idk kid that seems like a bad idea

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@birdman he is caring, compassionate, loves his wife, strives to make the world a greener place, defends the world from things and beings that try to destroy it, and wants the world to be safer.

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@peterparkour shit kid

 

**Pepper @PPotts**

@peterparkour @Tony_Stark Tony is crying, love you, kid <3

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@PPotts @Tony_Stark oh no!! i didnt mean to make you cry im so sorry mr stark dhejdbsjs!!!

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@peterparkour god it’s ok kid, continue being yourself.

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Tony_Stark i dont think i understand

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@peterparkour you will

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Tony_Stark what

 

-

 

**Kat @katgirl**

this is the irondad content we never knew we needed

 

-

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

I need to go on a rant Peter is just so pure and innocent and doesnt deserve this shit hole of a world he deserves one that is so much better and safer he deserves everything and more and is just a big puppy and i love my son

 

-

private dms uwu

-

 

**Pepper:**

congratulations, everyone now believes Peter is your son.

Which, they aren’t exactly wrong, you’re one signature from him being your legal son.

 

**Tony:**

Oops?

 

**Pepper:**

Why did you go on that rant?

 

**Tony:**

he sneezed.

it was so adorable and he blushed and looked at me embarrassed and he looked like a little baby deer and my heart is so full of love what is this

 

**Pepper:**

I can get adoption paper, we would just need to consult with May.

 

**Tony:**

What

 

**Pepper:**

For a ‘genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist’ you sure are stupid.

Do you want to adopt him?

 

**Tony:**

Why would I adopt him?

 

**Pepper is offline**

 

**Tony** :

Wait Pep

Come back

oh my god Peter just pet Dum-E im crying

 

-

 

**Thor* @thundergod**   
Tiny sleepy human :) <3 [underneath the text is a picture of a sleeping Spider-Man, whom of which is wrapped up and bundled in fluffy blankets, only his mask-covered face is visible, though if you look closely you could see some visible red fingers]

 

**Queen* @queennat**

@thundergod little baby uwu

 

**Captain America* @Cap.Rogers**

@thundergod Cute child <3

 

**BB* @greenman**

@thundergod Sleepy genius, must protect

 

**Rhodey* @IronPatriot**

@thundergod spider baby

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@thundergod i love my son

 

**Bucky B @notarobot**

@thundergod I’d kill for that tiny baby.

 

**Fury* @DFury**

@thundergod How many protocols are there to protect Spider-Man?

 

**Iron Man* @Tony_Stark**

@DFury @thundergod Many.

 

**Fury* @DFury**

@Tony_Stark Good.

 

**snake @slitherin**

@thundergod I will protect that child with my life.

 

-

 

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

as revenge for thor taking that pic of me i…

 

**Spider Aunt* @queennat**

@swingsbothways How is this revenge?

 

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

@queennat it just is!!!

 

**Iron Dad* @Tony_Stark**

@swingsbothways I love how this is your type of ‘revenge’

 

**Iron Uncle* @IronPatriot**

@swingsbothways I wake up and see this shit… I love it.

 

**Iron Mom @PPotts**

@swingsbothways I’m crying in the middle of a meeting

 

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

@PPotts im sorry!! i can change it back!

 

**Pepper @PPotts**

@swingsbothways No, no, don't do that!

 

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

@PPotts oh

 

**Iron Mom @PPotts**

@swingsbothways Thank you.

 

**Uncle America* @Cap.Rogers**

@swingsbothways I’m a proud uncle :)

 

**Uncle Bruce* @greenman**

@swingsbothways please im trying to do science but my tears are blurring everything

 

**Uncle Bucky @notarobot**

@swingsbothways you do realise i would still give my life for you, right kid?

 

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

@notarobot no!!! dont give your life!!! please!!!

 

**Uncle Bucky @notarobot**

@swingsbothways still would sorry

 

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

@notarobot no please

 

**Bird Uncle 1* @archerbird**

@swingsbothways HAHA IM BIRD UNCLE 1!!!

 

**Bird Uncle 2 @birdman**

@archerbird @swingsbothways i hate you

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@swingsbothways i am quite proud of this ‘uncle’ title!

 

**snake uncle @slitherin**

@swingsbothways thank you for keeping it lower-case

 

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

@swingsbothways ofc ofc

 

-

 

**Pirate Uncle* @DFury**

spidey even got me...

 

-

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

that whole Spider-Man uncle-aunt thing is hilarious

 

**bider-king @swingsbothways**

@fthompson lmao

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@swingsbothways omgomgomg i made a fan page on tumblr for you!!! [link]

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@fthompson @swingsbothways maybe life isn’t so bad lmao

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a l r i g h t hows the long chapter?


	17. i am now verified!! in the eyes of!!! god!!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Iron Uncle* @IronPatriot
> 
> @IronSandwich Don't tell me you framed it
> 
>  
> 
> Iron Dad* @IronSandwich
> 
> @IronPatriot I don't frame everything he makes, Platypus.
> 
>  
> 
> Iron Uncle* @IronPatriot
> 
> @IronSandwich You framed a failed blueprint of his.
> 
>  
> 
> Iron Dad* @IronSandwich
> 
> @IronPatriot He tried and it was amazing. An improved blueprint of that made the best iron suit, I framed that as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i almost (accidentally) deleted all this because my teacher yelled and i jumped (i have severe social anxiety) and yeah

**bider-king***

@swingsbothways

**Following:** 26 **Followers:** 174k

 

Bio: I swing both ways

Joined: August 2015

Location: I spend my time on the tops of buildings

  
  


\--

 

Pinned Tweet

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

i just swung and face planted into a giant donut

 

\--

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

i’m verified!!! i am now verified!! in the eyes of!!! god!!!

 

**Iron Dad* @Tony_Stark**

@swingsbothways Just because you are now verified on Twitter doesn't mean you haven't been verified in the eyes of the people.

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@Tony_Stark but!!! valid!!!

 

**Iron Dad* @Tony_Stark**

@swingsbothways You've always been valid

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@Tony_Stark mr dad [b]lease

 

-

 

**Iron Dad* @Tony_Stark**

@PPotts Do you have the adoption papers?

 

**Iron Mom @PPotts**

@Tony_Stark Of course; what do you think I am, you?

 

**Iron Dad* @Tony_Stark**

@PPotts Thank you <3

 

-

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

does Spider-Man is Tony Stark son?

 

**Iron Dad* @Tony_Stark**

@ned.in.the.chair Yes he do.

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@Tony_Stark @ned.in.the.chair fucking yeet i guess heck yeah i do

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@swingsbothways holy shit

-

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

does Spider-Man is Tony Stark son?

 

**Iron Dad* @Tony_Stark**

@ned.in.the.chair Yes he do.

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@Tony_Stark @ned.in.the.chair fucking yeet i guess heck yeah i do

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@swingsbothways holy shit

 

-

-

 

**snake uncle @slitherin**

fuck this shit hasta la pasta

 

**im unoriginal @hisshiss**

@slitherin who do i need to eat

 

**snake uncle @slitherin**

@hisshiss no, dont eat anyone.

 

**im unoriginal @hisshiss**

@slitherin but dad

 

**snake uncle @slitherin**

@hisshiss no, its considered a crime to eat people

 

**im unoriginal @hisshiss**

@slitherin fine

 

**im unoriginal @hisshiss**

@slitherin but why are you upset?

 

**snake uncle @slitherin**

@hisshiss thor ate my ice cream and it was the last box.

 

**im unoriginal @hisshiss**

@slitherin oof

 

-

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
I have been stabbed

 

**Uncle Bruce* @greenman**

Loki… 

 

**snake uncle @slitherin**

@greenman it wasn't me

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@greenman @slitherin He is not lying, it was a snake.

 

**Uncle Bruce* @greenman**

@thundergod …

 

-

 

**snake uncle @slitherin**

@hisshiss did you stab my brother? 

 

**im unoriginal @hisshiss**

[maybeso.gif]

 

**snake uncle @slitherin**

@hisshiss … well done.

 

**im unoriginal @hisshiss**

@slitherin thanks dad [thankssatan.gif]

 

**snake uncle @slitherin**

@hisshiss excuse me?

 

**im unoriginal @hisshiss**

@slitherin sorry

 

**Horse Boy @sleipnir**

@hisshiss @slitherin lmfao @wolfboi

 

**Fen @wolfboi**

@sleipnir @hisshiss oof [you know those pictures/edited pictures of cevans laughing? Yeah it's that but imagine him being more steve-y]

 

-

 

**Sal @avrillavigne**

I think someone put something in my water bottle…

 

**Bon Jovi @charles**

@avrillavigne ???

 

**Sal @avrillavigne**

@charles peter is a twink that can't walk up a flight of stairs without being exhausted there is no way his tiny noodle body could be able to do that without iron man or captain america helping him

 

**Bon Jovi @charles**

@avrillavigne i'm still confused

 

**Sal @avrillavigne**

@charles you know the library doors that weigh a ton and require like 3 people to open?

 

**Bon Jovi @charles**

@avrillavigne yeah..?

 

**Sal @avrillavigne**

@charles peter just opened it easily. by himself. ned was there, he didn't help. peter did it as easily as if he were opening a book.

 

**false! @dingabe**

@avrillavigne @charles i once saw peter lift up his shirt to wipe his face, he is fucking jacked, swol, he is far from a noodle.

 

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@dingabe i thought i was hallucinating those muscles…

 

**Ali @alisonbb**

@bbrant we are in the same gym class, peter once picked up a 20lb dumbell like it was a twig and gave it to his friend who basically fell over.

 

**Iron Uncle* @IronPatriot**

@alisonbb @bbrant [@etc] Oh yeah he's strong

 

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@IronPatriot ???

 

**Iron Uncle* @IronPatriot**

@bbrant FRIDAY alerted me that you kids were talking about him so I checked it out.

 

**Bon Jovi @charles**

wtf is going on

 

-

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

mr. stark that wasn't very funky fresh of you

 

**no soul @soullesscap**

what did he do???

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@soullescap he took my sandwich and took a bite out of it :(

 

**Iron Dad* @Tony_Stark**

@peterparkour THAT WAS YOURS??? I THOUGHT IT WAS MINE I'M SORRY

 

-

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@IronSandwhich are these sandwiches mine?

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@peterparkour Yes

 

-

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@peterparkour Did you do this?

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@IronSandwhich yes

 

\- 

 

**Iron Uncle* @IronPatriot**

I open twitter and see that my nephew did that [cry-laughing emoji]

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@IronPatriot It's amazing

 

**Iron Uncle* @IronPatriot**

@IronSandwich Don't tell me you framed it

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@IronPatriot I don't frame everything he makes, Platypus. 

 

**Iron Uncle* @IronPatriot**

@IronSandwich You framed a failed blueprint of his.

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@IronPatriot He tried and it was amazing. An improved blueprint of that made the best iron suit, I framed that as well.

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@IronSandwhich you frame my stuff???

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@IronPatriot … Mayhaps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> s o h o w w a s t h i s


	18. my homosexuality is taking over my life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bi bi bi @bishit
> 
> Holy shit Captain America is bi and trans this is amazing dbksjvfkjxvkjcsd
> 
>  
> 
> bider-king* @swingsbothways
> 
> @bishit lmao the we really werent lying when we said “Make America Gay Again” huh? [laughing emojis]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope yall like this shit

**peter-man @peterparkour**

bucky just tripped and fell on his face because he was too busy staring at steves butt

 

**Uncle Bucky @notarobot**

@peterparkour please don't expose me like this

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@notarobot @peterparkour It is a nice ass

 

**Uncle Bucky @notarobot**

@IronSandwich that is Americas ass…

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

he almost tripped again. bucky stop tripping on your Gaytm

 

**Uncle Bucky @notarobot**

@peterparkour i can't help it!!

 

**Uncle America* @Cap.Rogers**

@notarobot glad to see i still have it

 

**Uncle Bucky @notarobot**

@Cap.Rogers sjdankjfsdsdv

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

i’ve  never seen bucky this red skjdskdnskjdnsk

 

**Uncle Bucky @notarobot**

my homosexuality is taking over my life

-

 

**bi bi bi @bishit**

@Cap.Rogers @notarobot i just found some document where it says steve was born a female, is this true???

 

**Uncle Bucky @notarobot**

@bishit yep, he was the first man to get ftm surgery, i'm honestly surprised it went so well

 

**Uncle America* @Cap.Rogers**

@bishit @notarobot You can't even tell! I'm still extremely happy when i look in the mirror and you can't tell what i was before!!!

 

**bi bi bi @bishit**

@Cap.Rogers @notarobot i'm so happy for you!

 

**Uncle America* @Cap.Rogers**

@bishit thank you!!!

 

-

 

**bi bi bi @bishit**

Holy shit Captain America is bi and trans this is amazing dbksjvfkjxvkjcsd

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@bishit lmao the we really werent lying when we said “Make America Gay Again” huh? [laughing emojis]

 

**bi bi bi @bishit**

@swingsbothways cdsjkbsdkjfndvm thank you for this gold i'm lov u

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@bishit i'm lov u too

-

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

alright, whos gonna make an account dedicated to steve rogers butt? (and ofc call it ‘Americas Ass’)

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour there are already a few

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@ned.in.the.chair amazing

 

**Americas Ass @rogersbutt**

@peterparkour @ned.in.the.chair hello

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@rogersbutt YOURE DOING AMAZING SWEETIE

 

-

 

**Iron Mom @PPotts**

@IronSandwich Why is there a fire in your lab?

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@PPotts I'm sorry he really does have a nice ass

 

**Iron Mom @PPotts**

@IronSandwich True, but still.

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@PPotts He was in my lab and I had a perfect view and I got distracted and left a prototype for too long and it sparked…

 

**Uncle America* @Cap.Rogers**

@IronSandwich So you didn't “poke the wrong cord”?

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@Cap.Rogers djsbvjkbadsjk

 

**FRIDAY @TS_AI**

@IronSandwich If you leave the prototype idle for too long it will explode, I recommend you stop having a ‘Gay Attack’ as you once called it.

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@TS_AI NJCNKASNDKJ FRIDAY VHADSBSA

 

-

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

bucky just walked out of the elevator and ‘aint no mountain high enough’ continued playing and steve just yelled from across the entire floor “AINT NO VALLEY LOW ENOUGH” and bucky yelled “AINT NO RIVER WIDE ENOUGH” and they yelled together “TO KEEP ME FROM GETTING TO YOU BABE”

 

**Uncle America* @Cap.Rogers**

@peterparkour you don't have all the facts

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@Cap.Rogers like what?

 

**Uncle America* @Cap.Rogers**

@peterparkour i love him

  



	19. thank you for your kind words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bider-king* @swingsbothways
> 
> steve just gave me The Look (Patriotic Edition)
> 
>  
> 
> bider-king* @swingsbothways
> 
> @swingsbothways damn it they saw this tweet now im getting The Look (Lite)

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

steve just gave me The Look (Patriotic Edition)

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@swingsbothways damn it they saw this tweet now im getting The Look (Lite)

 

**Uncle America* @Cap.Rogers**

@swingsbothways you ate all the food

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@Cap.Rogers and i enjoyed every bite

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

hekpp

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

Rest in peace, Spider-Man. Killed by Captain America and Sergeant James Barnes after he ate all the food. May we press ‘f’ to pay respects. 

 

**Bon Jovi @charles**

@ned.in.the.chair f 

 

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@ned.in.the.chair f

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

you know that thing where people say “youre not gonna eat all that” and you say “yes i am” but you do and they say “youre gonna feel so sick later” and you say “no i'm not” but you do?

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour oof

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@ned.in.the.chair thank you for your kind words

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour np bro

 

-

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

i shouldnt have eaten all that food 

 

**Uncle Bucky @notarobot**

@swingsbothways you dug your grave, now lie in it 

 

**Uncle America* @Cap.Rogers**

@swingsbothways you reap what you sow

 

-

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@IronSandwich Where are the Pop Tarts?

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@thundergod Spidey ate them

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@IronSandwich Oh

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@IronSandwich Where is all the food [picture of the kitchen, all the drawers and cabinets are open… there is no food, all the food is gone]

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@thundergod … Spidey ate it all

 

**-**

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

thor just barged into my rokm

 

**Bird Uncle 1* @archerbird**

@swingsbothways this is what you get

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@swingsbothways Shouldn’t have eaten all the food, kid.

 

**Uncle Bucky @notarobot**

@swingsbothways rip

 

**Uncle America* @Cap.Rogers**

@swingsbothways If you were so hungry I could have made you a meal, you didn't have to eat literally everything… 

 

**Spider Aunt* @queennat**

@swingsbothways we had a whole box of pizza and you ate that. I was gonna eat that, it even had my name on it. This is what you get.

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

IM SORYD KJSNAMCNDIASK

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@swingsbothways Get on top of the fridge.

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@IronSandwich this house is a hecking nightmare.

 

-

 

**Cindy @moonmoon**

I was in lunch and I saw that Peter had two trays, so I thought he was saving one for Ned. Nope. Ned comes over with his own tray, and Peter eats everything on his two trays. Peter is Kirby-Kin

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

@moonmoon … what 

 

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@moonmoon where does that twink of a nerd put all that food

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@bbrant @moonmoon one time he ate a whole pizza

 

**Bon Jovi @charles**

@ned.in.the.chair @moonmoon peter is spiderman confirmed 

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@charles cjdsbcjkckjsdsnsk

 

-

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

Thor: *exists*

Bruce: hnnnng big man big muscles kjkjss

 

**Uncle Bruce* @greenman**

@peterparkour please don't expose me like this 

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@greenman CNDSKJNAKJDS

 

-

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

dont fuck with me ive got the power of god and anime on my side

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@swingsbothways who hurt you

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@ned.in.the.chair life

 

**Bird Uncle 1* @archerbird**

@swingsbothways Kid we can get you a therapist, I mean, we all have one, it’s okay to hurt, but if you need help we can get you a therapist.

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@archerbird im a gen z child being depressed and having no will to live is our culture 

 

**Bird Uncle 1* @archerbird**

@swingsbothways ????

 

-

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

… am i disappointed or just not surprised...

**Bird Uncle 2 @birdman**

@IronSandwhich ???

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@birdman the kid brought his friend over to the tower and they laughed and peter got on top of the fridge, jumped off it and said “im gay” and now they are on the floor laughing and im just here sipping my coffee

-

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

WHO GAVE PETER A KNIFE?!

**snake uncle @slitherin**

Tony: what have you got in your hands?

Peter: A KNIFE! :D

Tony: NO

Rhodes: oh my god why does he have a knife

-

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@ned.in.the.chair you meme a lot to me

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour bro <3

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@ned.in.the.chair bro <3

-

**Uncle Bruce* @greenman**

here comes trouble… [picture of a smug looking peter walking into a lab]

**Uncle Bruce* @greenman**

oh fuck make it double [peter and loki walking, they look smug]

**Uncle Bruce* @greenman**

im terrified [shuri is with them]

**Uncle Bruce* @greenman**

this is the apocalypse hide your families [mj is with them]

-

**peter-man @peterparkour**

never underestimate the power of women @QueenBitch @PPotts

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@peterparkour spare me

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@IronSandwich lmao no

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@PPotts and i made iron man our bitch

**Iron Mom @PPotts**

@QueenBitch Do you want to become my intern? You are very strong willed and intelligent, that can take you many places in the future.

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@PPotts we just met

**Iron Mom @PPotts**

@QueenBitch The second Tony looked at Peter he was his son

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@PPotts yeah youre right


	20. stab wound? dont you mean extra hole?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> snake uncle @slitherin
> 
> what ice cream do kids like best???
> 
> [poll:
> 
> Vanilla: 22%
> 
> Chocolate: 35%
> 
> Cookie Dough: 43%
> 
> 2.4m votes]
> 
>  
> 
> snake uncle @slitherin
> 
> @wolfboi @sleipnir @hisshiss yall want ice cream?
> 
>  
> 
> im unoriginal @hisshiss
> 
> @slitherin dnsacjkxzn yes dad
> 
>  
> 
> Fen @wolfboi
> 
> @slitherin i've never had ice cream

**Bird Uncle 1* @archerbird**

@slitherin you ready to fucken die?

 

**snake uncle @slitherin**

@archerbird im a bad bitch you cant kill me

 

-

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

hey @swingsbothways how did the avengers start??

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@ned.in.the.chair god fucked off when steve yote himself into the atlantic. tony said “fuck it it cant get any worse than this” and built a metal suit and rekt everyone. thor said “heck you“ bruce tried to meditate his problems away. nick fury showed up.

 

**Pirate Uncle* @DFury**

@swingsbothways well you’re not wrong…

 

**Uncle America* @Cap.Rogers**

@DFury what

 

-

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

If you play ‘When the Levee Breaks’ by Led Zeppelin next to a cactus it will dance believe me I'm smart

 

-

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

I can't accept the fact that Peter Parker, Nerd Extraordinaire, @peterparkour, knows Tony freaking Stark

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@fthompson he's a puppy [it's a picture of Movie Night at the Compound, Peter is cuddled into Tony, who has an arm around him, one of Peters legs is thrown over Natasha’s lap, and the rest of the Avengers including Thor are looking at Peter like a kid would at a puppy]

 

**Cindy @moonmoon**

@IronSandwich of course peter would make the friggen avengers, especially Iron Man, Tony Stark, THE “genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist,” fall for him ofc

 

**rise and shine @bbrant**

@moonmoon @IronSandwich are we even surprised anymore

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@moonmoon well mr stark isn't much of a ‘playboy’ anymore i mean have you seen the way he looks at pepper?? [picture of Tony looking at Pepper with love while he holds a cup of coffee, as if she hung the moon and stars, honestly he is so in love]

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@peterparkour @moonmoon Only her… 

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@IronSandwich @moonmoon see?

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@peterparkour Listen, I love her

 

**Iron Mom @PPotts**

@IronSandwich @peterparkour I love you too, now, would you like me to get the adoption papers?

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@PPotts @IronSandwich the what

 

**false! @dingabe**

@peterparkour @PPotts @IronSandwich [it's just a reaction image of a guy that looks so-not surprised and is done with life]

 

-

**snake uncle @slitherin**

what ice cream do kids like best??? 

[poll:

Vanilla: 22%

Chocolate: 35%

Cookie Dough: 43%

2.4m votes]

**snake uncle @slitherin**

@wolfboi @sleipnir @hisshiss yall want ice cream?

**im unoriginal @hisshiss**

@slitherin dnsacjkxzn yes dad

**Fen @wolfboi**

@slitherin i've never had ice cream

-

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
stab wound? dont you mean extra hole?

**Uncle Bruce* @greenman**

@thundergod Thor, what the - and I can’t stress this enough - actual ever loving fuck?

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@greenman i got stabbed

**Uncle Bruce* @greenman**

@thundergod … blocked

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@thundergod what did you mean by extra hole???

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@peterparkour you know

**Iron Uncle* @IronPatriot**

@IronSandwich @peterparkour @thundergod come get your child

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@IronPatriot oh god

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@QueenBitch @thundergod ???

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@QueenBitch @thundergod oh...

-

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
i cant believe peter blocked me

**snake uncle @slitherin**

@thundergod you deserve worse after that cursed tweet

-

**cursed tweets @hauntedtweets**

[picture of Thor’s tweet]


	21. what the actual fuck no

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thunder Uncle* @thundergod  
> @IronSandwich i hope this is not too personal, but who is Baby Spiders mother???
> 
>  
> 
> Iron Dad* @IronSandwich
> 
> @thundergod uhhh idk???? why???
> 
>  
> 
> Thunder Uncle* @thundergod  
> @IronSandwich so you didn't have sex with a spider?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you like this :)

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

Peter just danced into the tower with the fucking Guardians of the Galaxy while all of them (aside from Nebula) singing ‘Mr. Blue Sky’. Did I mention the fact that Peter had a long pole and was leading them?

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@IronSandwich i'm gonna give them twitter accounts!!

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@peterparkour NO!

 

-

 

**Star Lord @PQuill**

Hello, Earth!

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@PQuill name bro!!!

 

**Star Lord @PQuill**

@peterparkour hi!!!

 

**Gamora @fiercest**

I don't understand this thing

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@fiercest i’ll show you

 

**Gamora @fiercest**

@peterparkour thank you

 

**I am Groot @iamgroot**

I am Groot

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@iamgroot hello groot!!

 

**I am Groot @iamgroot**

@peterparkour I am Groot

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@iamgroot i'm glad you like your phone :)

 

**Star Lord @PQuill**

@peterparkour you just met him how do you understand him? It took me months!

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@PQuill idk i just do

**Star Lord @PQuill**

@peterparkour what does idk mean?

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@PQuill i don't know

 

**Star Lord @PQuill**

@peterparkour then why did you use it?

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@PQuill no, it means ‘i don't know’

 

**Star Lord @PQuill**

@peterparkour oh…

 

**Rocket @notaraccoon**

@PQuill idiot

 

-

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
Help i lost my hammer 

 

**Bird Uncle 1* @archerbird**

@thundergod did you try calling it?

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@archerbird of course!! but it didn't come!!! I can't find it i'm so upset!!!

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@thundergod i have it, you left it in the living room so i asked friday where you were so i could give it back but you were gone

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**

@swingsbothways … you picked it up?

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@thundergod … uh,,, yeah…?

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**

@swingsbothways THE BABY OF SPIDERS IS WORTHY! WE MUST CELEBRATE !!!!!!

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@thundergod Of course my son is, he is who he is, pure.

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**

@IronSandwich You have raised an amazing child, Man of Iron, you must be proud

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@thundergod I am so proud

 

**FRIDAY @TS_AI**

@thundergod @IronSandwich he is crying, he is very proud.

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@thundergod … do you want mjolnir back???

-

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

my friend can hold mjolnir i am vibrating holy shit

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@ned.in.the.chair are we even surprised? 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@QueenBitch no

-

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@IronSandwich i hope this is not too personal, but who is Baby Spiders mother??? 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@thundergod uhhh idk???? why???

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@IronSandwich so you didn't have sex with a spider?

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@thundergod what the actual fuck no

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@IronSandwich then how did Baby Spider get his powers?

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@thundergod idk he hasnt told me

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@IronSandwich oh

 

-

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@swingsbothways are your spidey-senses tingling? you look like satan is tailing you

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@ned.in.the.chair you mean my glorified anxiety? yes

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@swingsbothways go be a superhero!!!!

 

-

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

THOR JUST BURSTED INTO MY CLASSROOM AND ASKED IF I FUCKED A SPIDER WHAT THE FUCK IS MY LIFE?!?!?

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

NJDWKSANJAKDNIBKABNMS

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

did peter fuck a spider

 

**Roger Harrington @mrharrington**

… 

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

I DID NOT FUCk A sPIDER

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@peterparkour THEN HOW dID YOU GET YOUR POWERS????

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@thundergod I WAS BIT BY A SPIDER

 

**Thunder Uncle* @thundergod**   
@peterparkour … oh

 

**Sal @avrillavigne**

I knew it, peter parker is spiderman

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@avrillavigne i am not spider-man!!! im just a normal kinda gen z child that was bit by a spider

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

thor just threw peter onto the wall

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@ned.in.the.chair “I'M A NORMAL CHILD WITH NO POWERS” peter says while he is sticking to a wall

 

**fastest man alive @fthompson**

God is punishing me for bullying spiderman i'm so sorry

 

**false! @dingabe**

I think our teacher lost his will to live [a picture of Mr. Harrington with his head in his crossed arms]

 

-

 

**Daily Bugle @DailyBugle**

Is Spider-Man, Queens’ menace, a highschooler? 

 

-

 

**Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado**

@peterparkour i can't believe thor outed you like that lmao

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@freshurivocado WHAT AM I GONNA DO NDJGwBSXAJHNXKJS

 

**Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado**

@peterparkour idk bro

 

**Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado**

@peterparkour hey you can do that ‘It's Wednesday, my dudes’ thing

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@freshurivocado oh my god cdjksbksjxnk

 

-

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

It's Wednesday, my dudes… [it's peter, in his suit without his mask, doing the iconic vine]

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour FINALLY 

 

**MJ @QueenBitch**

@peterparkour i've been waiting for this

 

**Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado**

@peterparkour [a very, very shaky video of shuri screaming “finally”]

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@freshurivocado [a shaky video of peter screaming except he's on the ceiling, then, May comes in asking what he's screaming about, by this time he has stopped screaming, looking awkward as he says “... nothing…”]

 

**May @mayp**

@peterparkour i thought you were dying!

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@mayp sorry may

 

**May @mayp**

@peterparkour it's okay

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im gonna be honest it might be a bit til i post a new chapter due to the fact that i am writing it (whereas i have 20+ pages of extra stuffs because i write ahead, but now i dont,,,...)


	22. ‘Iron Dad, Spider-Son’ is trending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “He has a frog in his mouth.” Bucky said.
> 
>  
> 
> “Why does everyone say I have a frog in my mouth?” “He has a frog in his mouth?” Jimmy asked.
> 
>  
> 
> “I don't have a frog in my mouth!” Peter groaned desperately. “Why does everyone say I have a frog in my mouth?” Peter looked to Tony as if he has the answer, “Uh.” Tony said intelligently, Peters shoulders droop.
> 
>  
> 
> “Your mouth looks like you have a frog in your mouth, and it's hopping around but you need to keep your mouth closed or else it will hop away.” Wanda said as if she only said ‘vanilla is my favourite ice cream’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ujwinsjaxndjkw cdskjnkas hope yall like :)

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

Hey @peterparkour the Avengers are gonna be interviewed for a tv show, wanna come?

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@IronSandwich HJCBKLXBNKSNK KMXSN HECK YEAH WHAT SHOW?!?!

 

**Iron Dad* @IronSandwich**

@peterparkour Jimmy Fallon

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

@IronSandwich DSKAUUDHNSKJHKSJ YES HIDSN HOLY SHIT ICDHLKSNKD

 

**May @mayp**

@IronSandwich he's literally bouncing off the walls [a video of peter literally bouncing off the walls, “MAY MAY MAY I'M GONNA GO ON JIMMY FALLON!!”]

 

 

-

 

Knock. Knock. Knock.

 

Peter jumped onto the floor, entire body vibrating in excitement. May looked at him with barely concealed amusement on her face. She walked over to the door, opening it. Tony Stark was at the door, wearing his usual suit and glasses. “Hey, May!” He said, smiling. He took of his glasses, happiness in his eyes as he looked at May, then to Peter. “Mr. Stark” May greeted.

 

“Mr. Stark!” Peter yelled, excited. He ran over to the older man, bouncing. Tony chuckled, humour painted on his face at the younger boys antics, “The limo is outside, you wanna come or are you having enough fun bouncing off the walls, literally.” Peter nodded enthusiastically.  

  


Peter sat in the limo, looking around at the other Avengers, Steve, Clint, Natasha, Bruce, Wanda, Vision and even Bucky, like he was a puppy, he was bouncing in his seat with too much excitement, like a puppy. “Hey, Pete.” Happy said, Peter whipped his head around and looked at him, “Hey, Happy!”

 

**peter-man @peterparkour**

DNAJKBXKJNIWCNBKMXANCJNKSJJXIOSNXJKJCNKN@OH@*GHIUCBSJKLBCHIHAN<BJHSBJSK<DJO

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@peterparkour mood

 

They all talked and laughed with each other, the limo the superheroes are in driving to New York City.

 

His Spidey-Senses buzzed in anticipation, the buzz a soft good feeling, telling him that what would happen would be good. This made him more excited, the other occupants comparing him to a puppy.

 

The car pulled in, “I can die happy after this.” Peter said, the Avengers laughed at that. “Wait- wait, Pete, put this on.” Tony said, giving him his mask. Peter wore his suit under a pair of jeans and a hoodie. He took those off and put on his mask. Peter crawled out of the sun roof on the car and jumped down in front of the Avengers. Security and a woman came over to them,

 

“Hello! I am Jennifer and I will escort you to your green room; there, you will wait a few and then I will walk you to the stage. Jimmy will meet you before that, though.” The woman, Jennifer, said, she looked excited. They smiled at her, thanking her.

  


The green-room was an off-white room with dark, grey-brown couches and two tables, it had a tv and a fridge and a bucket of water bottles and alcohol. Peter walked over to the fridge and opened it, “Guys! Cupcakes!” Clint walked over and pulled out the box of cupcakes. He put it on the table, opening it. Peter instantly took one, Clint next. “This is the highest priced low-quality green-room I've been in.” Tony said, looking around. “I think it's roomy” Peter said, smiling as he took a bite out of the vanilla pink frosted cupcake.

 

“There are Avengers-themes cookies” Wanda said, looking at a tray of cookies. Peter hummed in excitement, walking over and taking an Iron-Man one. “Mr. Stark this is so cool!” Peter was bouncing on his feet.

 

“Vision cookies.” Wanda said, smiling as she held up a cookie with a vague detailing of the android, Vision smiled at that. “Wanda, there are cookies with you on them, I think.” He said, looking at a cookie with the detailing of her magic, the magic being red frosting with red sparkly sprinkles. Steve walked over, and took a Captain America cookie, it having the shield design on it.

Tony, Bruce, and Bucky walked over together. “They even made Spider-Man cookies.” Peter gasped, “I'm going to cry, they made Spider-Man cookies?!” He covered his mouth with his hand.

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

GUYS THEY MADE SPIDERMAN  COOKIES JCDBKJXNSKA [a picture of the plate, a red hand held up a frosted Spider-Man cookie, the plate of cookies under it out of focus, you could vaguely see the other Avengers legs.]

 

**I’m In @ned.in.the.chair**

@swingsbothways if you ate the spider-man cookies would it count as cannibalism?

 

**bider-king* @swingsbothways**

@ned.in.the.chair ned what the h e c k

 

Peter looked at his phone with barely concealed confusion, then asked “If I ate a Spider-Man cookie would it be cannibalism?” The room instantly got silent and looked at Peter weirdly. The door opened and in walked Jimmy Fallon, “Oh my god it's Jimmy Fallon!” Peter whisper yelled, whipping his mouth of crumbs and pulling his mask down. Jimmy laughed, “Hi, Spider-Man.”

 

“Jimmy!” Tony greeted, putting his sunglasses on. “Mr. Stark, hello.” Jimmy greeted, walking forward and shaking his hand.

 

Jimmy greeted the present Avengers, shaking their hands. “Okay, so, I will go out onto the stage, talk a bit about you guys, and then you will come out and sit on the couches.” Jimmy said, voice friendly.

 

“I am so happy you guys are here, normally the only people who get to talk to you are just journalists, but a show host! Ha!” Jimmy said, excited. He clapped his hands together, looking at the superheroes in front of him. “Alright, so - uh - I'm gonna go out to the stage.” He smiled at them and left.

  


The Avengers waiting while Jimmy talked about them on screen, and then a women came into the room, “I’ll escort you to the stage.” She smiled, and walked away, the superheroes - some of who had their cookies or cupcakes - following her. The walk to the stage was short, only a few turns and then they were standing behind a dark-coloured curtain, in front of them was the stage of the Tonight Show.

 

“Now, speaking of the Avengers.” The crowd cheered incredibly loud at that, Peter wouldn't be surprised if Queens heard the crowd. “We have… Captain America!” Screams. Steve walked in, wearing his iconic suit and holding his shield. “Iron Man!” Tony walks out, not in his Iron Man suit, but he does have his arc reactor. Peters surprised a crowd could get this loud. “Black Widow!” Natasha walks out with Clint, both wearing their suits. The crowd takes on a higher pitch. “And Hawkeye!” “The Hulk!” Bruce walks out in a purple button up and jeans. “Scarlet Witch!” Wanda walks onto the stage in the clothes she wore during Ultron. “The Vision!” Vision walks out in his android form, Peter is surprised he is walking.

 

“We also have a surprise guest, Sergeant Barnes!” Bucky walks out, wearing his Wakandan suit. He awkwardly waves at the crowd, whom of which waves back with much more excitement. Bucky walks to Steve, who smiles and laughs at his awkwardness, Bucky soon joins with silent chuckles, “This is so weird.”

 

“We also have another guest, he wears red and blue spandex and is from Queens, Spider-Man” Peter, who was climbing on the ceiling, jumps down, doing the ‘superhero landing’, he jumps up and waves at the crowd happily, grinning stupidly under the mask.

 

“You can't tell but he's grinning like a dork under the mask.” Tony said, taking a bite from his Spider-Man cookie. Peter looks at him and nods, “I'm on Jimmy Fallon!” He bounces. The Avengers laugh and take a seat, Peter squeezing in between the arm rest and Tony.

 

“So! You guys are the Avengers-!” Jimmy says, looking at the odd group with awe. “Not this kid.” Tony says, pointing at Peter. “But Mr. Stark! I've fought with you guys!” Peter pouts. “True, but still.” “When can I be an Avenger?” “Some day.”  “Mr. Stark that’s not a valid answer!” “It is now.”

 

The crowd watch quietly as the two talk with a close familiarity.

 

“Okay, I have a question.” Jimmy asks, they all look at Jimmy, “Shoot.” “Okay… Why is he not an Avenger? I mean, I'm sure we all have seen the videos, what he can do, he's great!”

 

Tony looks at Jimmy, “Well, I did ask once.” “Wait that wasn't a test?” Tony laughs loudly, “You-? You thought that was a test?”

 

Peter looks dumbly at him, “Yeah…”

 

“Peter…” Tony said sympathetically, laughing with his head thrown back. The other guests were in similar positions as Tony, either doubling over or throwing their head back as they laughed, Bucky was quietly chuckling though.

 

“Peter? Your name’s Peter?” Jimmy asked, looking at Peter expectantly. Peter stared dead into his eyes, his time has come; he smirks, raises his chin, a dramatic pause, “Maybe so.”

 

Wanda scoffs, chuckling, “I thought you were gonna come out and reveal your identity.”

 

“I thought I wasn’t in the closet anymore?” Peter jokes, looking at Wanda.

 

“Oh yeah! You’re bisexual!” Jimmy says, he looks like a puppy, or a news reporter-slash-journalist getting all the drama and ‘tea’.

 

“I’m a bicon.” Peter affirms, smiling and feeling proud of the Tumblr-and-Twitter-given title, “Thanks Tumblr, and Twitter.” Peter thanks, looking at the different cameras.

 

“What’s it like being your own icon?”

 

“It’s amazing, y’know, I meet and hear of a lot of people who say that I’m the reason they came out, it’s honestly amazing, knowing that not only am I doing good fighting crime, but I’m also giving people the confidence to help them come out. It’s easy - kind of - coming out as Spider-Man since i have a suit and mask, but in real life? It’s so difficult because you could lose friends and family for being who you are.”

 

“You're too pure for this world, kid.” Bucky said, smiling softly at him. The Avengers nod in agreement, and Peter looks at Tony, who smiles at him. Peter feels warmth bloom in his chest, his mentor, Tony Stark, is proud of him, he's honestly his father figure at this point. Peter grins at the audience, despite them not being able to see his face. “You can't tell but he is grinning under the mask. Again.” Natasha said.

 

“Look at how proud Tony is.” Bruce said, chuckling. “His son is an icon.”

 

“Son?” Peter asked, confused. “You know what's hilarious?” Natasha started, “These two are geniuses… And yet they are so stupid and oblivious.”

 

“Hey, Spideys not stupid.” “What if I am?” “No.” “Okay.” The team snickered at their conversation.

 

“He- He's so pure.” Jimmy said, resting his head on his hands. “He really is.” The team says. “I'm not pure!”

 

“Kitten-” Natasha said, “No, he's a puppy.” “Ray of sunshine.” Wanda said. “Yes he is.” Bruce agreed. “He has a frog in his mouth.” Bucky said.

 

“Why does everyone say I have a frog in my mouth?” “He has a frog in his mouth?” Jimmy asked.

 

“I don't have a frog in my mouth!” Peter groaned desperately. “Why does everyone say I have a frog in my mouth?” Peter looked to Tony as if he has the answer, “Uh.” Tony said intelligently, Peters shoulders droop.

 

“Your mouth looks like you have a frog in your mouth, and it's hopping around but you need to keep your mouth closed or else it will hop away.” Wanda said as if she only said ‘vanilla is my favourite ice cream’.

 

Jimmy laughed hysterically, “I'm going to be honest I have no idea what is happening but it's hilarious.” Clint snorted.

 

“I don't understand, how does Peter look like he has a frog in his mouth?” Vision asked, eyebrows furrowed in confusion, Wanda shook her head fondly, a gentle smile on her face.

 

“Fun spider fact: there is a species of spider that keeps frogs as pets.” Peter chirped. Bucky looked at him with a face of pure confusion, he tried to say something but it came out as a confused mumble-slash-groan.

 

“Why- how do you know this?” Steve asked in place of Bucky.

“I used to love peppermint, and oranges were nice, but ever since the spider bit me they make me feel like I'm being killed by a sweet smell. I hate them.” Peter said simply. “That doesn’t answer my question?” Steve asked.

 

“Oh, yeah, spiders hate peppermint and citrus.” Bruce spoke.

 

“Makes sense, one time i scared him and he jumped, curled into a ball, and just… Laid there on the floor.” Tony started, “I looked it up and apparently Brown Widow Spiders do that when frightened.”

 

The audience was laughing as they learned how Spider-Man was really a spider.

 

“Okay, so, if I may; everyone really wants to know who Spider-Man is, all we know is that he is a high-schooler - which is honestly terrifying, you’re supposed to be worrying about girls and boys and getting good grades - uh- so, will you take off the mask?” Jimmy asked, Peter looked at Tony, then the rest of the Avengers.

 

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to, kid.” Steve said, the others nodding in agreement.

 

Peter smirked under the red mask, he stood up, tall - but not really - squared his shoulders, and reached up. He tore off his mask, brown curls bouncing as they were released from the tight confine of the mask, his chocolate doe eyes proud as he stared at the audience who cheered as they finally have a real face, not a mask, to put to the name ‘Spider-Man’, his smirk widened,

 

“I am, Spider-Man.”

 

-

 

The show finished up, and the team went back to the green room, the cookies they brought on stage were gone, but they wanted more. “You really are Tonys son.” Clint said, “You revealed yourself like he did.”

 

“Look on Twitter, it’s blowing up, ‘Iron Dad, Spider-Son’ is trending.” Wanda said.

 

Natasha took out her phone, “‘Tony Stark is so proud of his Spider-Son, look at his eyes, so full of love. If Tony hasn’t adopted the kid legally, he has emotionally.’ The person quoted a video of the show.”

 

“‘Iron Dad, Spider-Son’ I like it.” Bruce said, looking at his phone. The team had their phones out and were scrolling through Twitter and Facebook.

 

“Hey there’s a picture of Tony and Peter” Steve said, it was a picture of the show they were on, after Peter took of his mask, Peter had his mouth open has he talked enthusiastically about something, and Tony was looking at him without his sunglasses, every photo on the internet of the two was of one of them looking at the other fondly.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really hope you guys like this jksxnkajsxnasx have a good gay
> 
> in case yall forgot (and its updated)
> 
> People:  
> -Peter Parker: peter-man @peterparkour  
> -Spider-Man: bider-king* @swingsbothways  
> -Ned Leeds: I’m In @ned.in.the.chair  
> -Michelle Jones: MJ @QueenBitch  
> \- Shuri: Ms. Keisha* @freshurivocado  
> -Tony Stark: Iron Dad* @IronSandwich  
> -Pepper Potts: Iron Mom @PPotts  
> -Steve Rogers: Uncle America* @Cap.Rogers  
> -James Rhodes: Iron Uncle* @IronPatriot  
> -Bruce Banner: Uncle Bruce* @greenman  
> -James Barnes: Uncle Bucky @notarobot  
> -Natasha Romanov: Spider Aunt* @queennat  
> -Sam Wilson: Bird Uncle 2 @birdman  
> -Clint Barton: Bird Uncle 1* @archerbird  
> -T’Challa: King T’Challa* @BlackPanther  
> -FRIDAY: FRIDAY @TS_AI  
> -Karen: Karen @spideysAI  
> -Nick Fury: Pirate Uncle* @DFury  
> -Thor: Thunder Uncle* @thundergod  
> -Loki: snake uncle @slitherin  
> -Wanda Maximoff: witch @witchbitch  
> -Vision: Vision @Vision  
> -The Avengers: The Avengers @Avengers  
> -May Parker: May @mayp  
> -Doctor Stephen Strange: Sorcerer Supreme @DocStrange
> 
> AcDec  
> Cindy Moon: Cindy @moonmoon  
> Flash Thompson: fastest man alive @fthompson  
> Betty Brant: rise and shine @bbrant  
> Abe Brown: false! @dingabe  
> Charles Murphy: Bon Jovi @charles  
> Sally Avril: Sal @avrillavigne  
> Roger Harrington: Roger Harrington @mrharrington
> 
> Guardians of the Galaxy:  
> Peter Quill: Star Lord @PQuill  
> Gamora: Gamora @fiercest  
> Rocket: Rocket @notaraccoon  
> Groot: I am Groot @iamgroot  
> Drax: Drax @draxthedestroyer  
> Nebula: Nebula @stabyou
> 
>  
> 
> Loki’s Children:  
> Fenrir: Fen @wolfboi  
> Sleipnir: Horse Boy @sleipnir  
> Jörmungandr: im unoriginal @hisshiss
> 
> News:
> 
> Daily Globe @DailyGlobe
> 
> The Pulse @The_Pulse
> 
> Daily Bugle @DailyBugle
> 
> The Guardian @TheGuardian


	23. whomp

yall i made a second book, this is becoming a series so i dont drag this on

**Author's Note:**

> uh, how did you like it? i hope you did lmao, also, no promises on updates, i'll just do it whenever because im committed like that :)


End file.
